Sunday, December 23, 2012

Making a list...

Hall's decked... check.

Attend adorable Christmas recital.... burst with pride.... check

Make obscene amounts of cookies... check.
Break expensive marble rolling pin handle moments after telling Bella it will be hers one day.... check.

Keep track of insane sugared up toddler.... mostly check. 

Have first grader address Christmas cards... call it "school work"..... Check!

Do actual school also... Check

Play in the snow till it hurts... Check

Make memories.
Share laughter.
Celebrate and savor childhood... Check.


Friday, December 14, 2012


I sit in the glow of the Christmas tree and candlelights.
I should be watching "It's a Wonderful Life" and meditating on that sentiment....
Instead I am watch the news and wondering why God allows this sort of tragedy.
Yesterday (in a fit of frustration) I was questioning why I don't send Isabella and Tommy to school.
Wouldn't they learn faster? Wouldn't it be easier on me and Tom... financially, time wise?

Today I am holding them close and thanking God that I can cuddle them through there reading lesson on Monday morning.

There are no right answers.
There are no easy choices.
But there is the clear message tonight to hold tight to your children and be thankful for the right now that you have with them. Send them to school on Monday or don't... but hold them close tonight. 

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Three Years, Five Years... the blink of an eye...

I started blogging three long.... llllooonnnngggg years ago.
It was Tommy's second birthday.

Today I kissed his five year old self goodnight.
I need a whole bottle of wine and a box of tissues to process that thought. 

Tomorrow he will become a teenager.
Next week he'll be learning to drive.
And before I know it his son will be five.
And I will look back at pictures of these days.
I am sure there will be sadness at what is past 
But I will see me in him and him in me and the future in it all.
The beautiful, blessed, bright future.

Where there maybe things beyond my control.
Where there will certainly be heartache...
 But where I am also sure I will find laughter.
I will laugh again as I laughed tonight while Bella said "Merry Chissssmasss!" with no front teeth.

I will laugh at Vivian bouncing and giggling on my knees... or her kids anyway.

I will laugh at Daniel and the whole role of toilet paper his son unrolled on the floor....

I will laugh with my husband about all our little inside jokes and about nothing and everything.

I will laugh at the days to come.... and hopefully through them too.